Well another horrible day. Don't mean to be such a Debbie Downer, but I fell down in the slippery grass and cut my hand up. Of course the man I live with, assumes I did this deliberately as I damaged his plant.
I have known him over half my life and if it were humanly possible, I would wish him right out of my head and life. I would have left him years ago when I realized hewasabusing me emotionally with his passive/aggressive behavior.
He has no idea how much I want to leave him and fall in love again. To experience love maybe one more time in my life.
If he was a truly good, caring man, especially about the fact that I have a chronic illness of pain and fatigue I could still love him.
But he doesn't listen to me. He does only what he absolutely has to. And I have frequently thought od just getting in my car and grabbing my dog and just start driving. The problem is, with today's technology. It's almost impossible to become "invisible" now. I long for those days before GPS and computers, where no one could spy on you or track you. Then I would take most of the money in our bank account and just disappear. There are only three or four people that I think would miss me. So I could be free again. But then I really couldn't be free because I need my doctor every month. He is the one that holds me here as a true hostage. That's what this illness and health insurance does. It makes you a hostage to the system.
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